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Something’s not right

Lonelyhart
Contributor

Suffering in silence

I'm a aussie guy 44 and live alone, I have done for a while as I lost my family members to tragedy after tragedy. I lost my wife and kids because of my inability to open up get the help I needed, now 8 years later I have been in a worse position. No friends no family and no direction for my aching heart or my mind of confused confetti. I try to sleep lots as I am not hurting when I sleep, but if I dream of a loved one I wake crying realize that i'm alone and hate the world more once again..I get up each morning and say today I will go out and find things to do. But I cant do it as there's nowhere to go...Although last Sunday I made it to church but I couldn't muster the courage to talk to anyone...I feel each day I become more invisible and soon no one will miss me here?? Help please anyone 😢

48 REPLIES 48

Re: Suffering in silence

@Lonelyhart  Welcome to the forum Lonelyhart. I cannot talk for long atm as I am due to walk out the door shortly. I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone. Please look around the forum and post on the various threads that might interest you or you might like to keep this thread going for awhile. You are amongst friends here. Love greepeax

 

*also if you want to talk to talk to someone directly put a @ infront of their name like I did for you they will receive a notification of your post.

Re: Suffering in silence

Thank you @greenpea, I need to catch myself before I fall ..this is my start ,the hardest part to achieve

Re: Suffering in silence

@Lonelyhart  you will have your friends here on Sane with you every step of the way. Little steps my friend, little steps and you will get there. Be kind to yourself. Have you got anything nice for yourself to do today?

Re: Suffering in silence

@greenpea not really ,that's why I try to sleep alot..

Re: Suffering in silence

@Lonelyhart  can you go out for a early morning stroll even around the block. If you see someone you might like to smile or even say good morning if you are up to it. I find most people are friendly some arent but that never stops me from trying.:)

Re: Suffering in silence

@Lonelyhart 

 

I do know how you feel.  I still have my husband, although he has no idea how to deal with me, so his answer is to just pretend nothing is wrong.  I can't really talk to him cause he doesn't want to know.

 

My kids are grown up and living in another state.  I get the occassional text from the youngest and the oldest calls about once a week, but that is to borrow money. 

 

I have no friends.  I actually prefer it that way.  I know how friendship end with me.  And it is never pretty.  I have learned that it is just not worth the effort.

 

Yes, it's lonely.  But for me at least, it's better than the alternative.  I have tried the "church" thing many times over the years.  People there can be very friendly and accepting as long as they believe that you believe exactly the same things that they do.  And that is just one more pretense in my life I no longer have the energy for.  I liked church.  But I always had to filter what was being said through the lens of my own belief system, and that is work.  And I always felt like a fraud there.  But then again, I always feel like a fraud wherever I am, so not sure that really matters.  

 

Best thing I can suggest is to find a hobby or interest that you can be really passionate about. For me that is photography.  It takes me out in nature, and I can be with the birds and animals who I consider to be my only friends. Fresh air and exercise... and no other people, which I really like.

 

I hope you find something that you can enjoy too.

Re: Suffering in silence

hello @Lonelyhart 

how are you today

one step at a time my friend and letting you know you are not alone

Hello @ETBug , @greenpea , @Gazza75 , @outlander , @CheerBear , @frog 

Re: Suffering in silence

It's like groundhog day, I have left this dark cloud fill my days for so long now it's like dark winter days every day..  But I am trying to tell myself positive things all day but I'm running out of believing my own words...As I said it's like I'm turning invisible...

Re: Suffering in silence

@Lonelyhart ,  my friend, you have made a step, soo glad you are here

You can do this , be kind to yourself

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