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marigold
New Contributor

I'm dumb

So basically one of the only things that really makes me depressed is I feel stupid. They say to do things like CBT but here is the problem. The evidence that I am stupid is that in school I had a helping teacher and was partially in special ED. So pretty miuch there is no evidence that goes againt my thoughts.

The only thing though that can go against it, is the fact that when I had to do an iq test I wasn't prepared for it, didn't want to be there, didn't care about it and was serverly anxious and basically just said I don't know to half the questions. The other is that there is nothing I can't do that other people can do. I might take a bit longer but I can still do everything maybe except for art. Sometimes it feels like a missdiagnosis, maybe i had mental health problems not learning problems back when I was at school.

It drives me nuts because I just feel everyone thinks im stupid and so i just keep to myself and don't bother talking to people. Oh and speaking of special ED it does more harm than good its a fact. I ended up getting bullied out of school but only after I was put into special ed program.

8 REPLIES 8

Re: I'm dumb

That sounds really tough @marigold. I'm so sorry to hear of what you're been through and the feelings it's raised for you. I also want to highlight some of what you've said about what you can do. I know it's hard to resist buying into all of the bad things, but I also want to encourage you to notice and celebrate the good you find too, and those things that you can do! 

greenpea
Senior Contributor

Re: I'm dumb

@marigold  Sweetheart my son2 amongst a duel diagnosis has a mild intellectual disabilty and a iq of 75. I appreciate your pain as he constantly feels pain re his intellectual problems. Just remember there are more important things than being smart.Being kind and caring are two values amongst many others which out weighs a high iq. Love greenpeaxx

Re: I'm dumb

Reading your post @marigold tells me that you are an intelligent and articulate person. IQ tests are unreliable so just ignore it. I have never done one and probably wouldn't do well either. I wouldn't bother with one. Misdiagnoses abound everywhere. Perhaps you just have difficulty expressing who you are, or finding what you are best at. Just try to better yourself in things you enjoy, or try new things if that is something you would like to do. Be kind to yourself, and be assured – you're certainly not dumb. Take care.

Zoe7
Community Guide

Re: I'm dumb

Hey @marigold and welcome to the forums Smiley Very Happy

 

There are so many forms of intelligence but unfortunately society is geared to look at academics rather than anything else - which should not be the case. IQ tests are used as an academic indicator but do not take into account ones social skills, empathy, care for others etc.- and they are more important in my view than being able to write an essay or count backwards from 100 in 7s. Another ridiculous example of academic testing is NAPLAN - specifically the writing section. It presumes that someone should be compared to another with how well they write a narrative yet very few people will actually become authors and even fewer have published work - so who really cares if you can write a story!!

 

What I believe is important is the emotional intelligence one has - that includes a recognition of oneself as a worthy and important person in this world. No doubt the bullying you suffered knocked that down for you but it does not have to define who you are now. Being self aware as well as conscious of others needs are so important for all of us. From what you have written already it seems you have both of those attributes - so NO you are not dumb - and don't let anyone ever tell you that or make you feel that way. Those people are the ones with the problems because they do not value difference nor do they value that everyone in this world has their own strengths and everyone of those strengths allow our society to function effectively (sometimes!). The greatest example of this has never been more evident than in the last couple of years - our frontline workers are not all those with a degree or years of formal education - the majority have been those that clean, supply and serve the public - and without them we would not have got through what we have had to. So find your strengths, work with them and allow yourself to know that whatever it is you CAN do are just the things you should focus on. You are worthy, you are smart and you matter.

Re: I'm dumb

I agree with you @Zoe7 - there are so many different forms of intelligence.

 

I was considered 'dumb' throughout my school life. In retrospect, I don't think the schooling system was for me. I felt I was in a dark cloud when i was at school, and nothing made sense.

 

I started 'waking' up AFTER I completed school. Life didn't make sense until after I'd left school. I was always considered the dud. People believed I was delayed. Looking back, school just wasn't for me!

 

To prove it, I've completed 3 bachelors degrees and a masters with high distinctions all through. So no... I don't think I fit on the 'dumb' scale. According to my psychologist, I'm a bit too bright to fit into the normal system. 

For me, it was about finding what I enjoyed and striving towards that.

 

if art is your go to, go for it! You are NOT dumb! If you saw me today, the most 'art' I can do is probably draw a stick figure... does that mean I'm dumb?

 

Be content with who you are and what you want to do. 

Hugs, @marigold 

Re: I'm dumb

Hi @marigold 

 

Sorry to say this, but the only person calling you dumb in your post is you?  In fact, the way I see it, people saw potential in you and enlisted help as a way to provide you with the potential they saw in you... Are you sure of your potential? Do you feel like with the right help, you could be more than you think you are right now?

 

 

Re: I'm dumb

For many people who are depressed there is an acute awareness of surroundings, they are often intune with those around them, understand current affairs and think on past present and future.

 

It's the ability to do this that displays incredible emotional intelligence to start with, yet we are forced to fit and conform to a system.

 

Celebrate how you are different, it's what makes you unique. I left School early and was told I would be a faliure my biggest mistake was believing them.Many of the succesful people out there dropped out of school, college, uni. Many of them struggled to fit in to the norm.

 

Take that conformist box that makes you feel dumb and tell them to shove it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Re: I'm dumb

Despite any learning struggles, you're being very articulate right now. You're perspective has helped me learn about my own tough climbs on the learning hills. That's all I got to say about that.

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