Schizophrenia in the work place

[MissLiz]

So I'm 39 and have schizophrenia. After 4 years of psychosis I've been medicated and was able to get my life back on track with the support of my family and close friends and numerous hospital visits. 

I've been in the same job for over 2 years and kept my diagnosis a secret and initially didn't have any problems aside from blank staring at people which I found out is kinda creepy.. with a medication adjustment I'm working hard to stop it. 

My psychiatrist has recently put me on a different medication and this was changed while working..hallucinations were expected. 

I experienced mild hallucinations but odly only in the workplace. ofcourse they scared me because it was completely random.

One of the girls I work with happened to be in the bathroom while I was washing my hands and I heard her ask how i was.. so I replied "good thanks, yourself?" She looked at me in horror and filed a formal complaint. Another girl got to experience my blank staring.. she told everyone that there was something wrong with me as I was also talking to myself.

All of these people have refused to work with me because they're afraid of me, so I've had to put in for a transfer . 

My supervisor mentioned two of the girls were traumatised by the events which makes me think they've never met anyone with schizophrenia or similar. I told an old friend who I text from time to time that i had a disability and they have ghosted me. 

Working tonight.. I'm Dreading it and have been thinking about suicide as a way out of this.  Probably not the best solution but it's on my mind.  

[tyme]

Hey @MissLiz ,

I'm sorry this has happened to you at work. It surely is a very misunderstood condition, and even for myself, I had to intently do my own self-study in order to better support someone experiencing hallucinations etc.

Have you had a chat to you boss about ways to work around this? I'm mindful that if these thoughts are leading you to contemplate suicide as a way out, then it does need to be seen to. Have you tried speaking to the two who were 'traumatised' by the situation? Sometimes hearing you explain things would be probably better than hearing it from anyone else.

Sitting with you. I hope there's some resolution in this.

Hugs, tyme

[FloatingFeather]

Hi @MissLiz,

Welcome to the Forums, my name is FloatingFeather and I am one of the peer support workers with SANE. It is nice to have you with us. I just finished reading your post and my heart goes out to you. I don't know much about schizophrenia to be honest but I really appreciate you sharing your story with us and offering an insight from your lived experience. 

What you have gone through sounds really challenging - it's great to read you had some really good supports around whilst you worked through things. I would imagine it must of been tough for you to hold down a job and keep what was going on for you a secret. It's a little sad to me that you couldn't share what you were going through with your employee / colleagues so you could feel supported and better understood. It's a shame that some people have issues with things (not just mental health but lots of things) due to ignorance and lack of understanding.

I really wish this wasn't your experience at work - it would be understandably very upsetting and traumatising for you to have people make you feel this way through no fault of your own. As with anyone you deserve to have a fulfilling, happy life with supportive and caring people in your corner. I'm sorry this has happened to you and I really do hope since you last posted your work situation has improved. 

Please take care of yourself - you have done so well to get your life back on track. Don't let your journey be derailed by other people.

Warm wishes, 

FloatingFeather