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Re: Trying makes it worse

Hi @EternalFlower 

 

Happy Easter!

 

Thanks for your support & wise words. I did appreciate it.

 

I need to put myself first, and I like that you mentioned calming activities - I need this. 

 

I had quick look at Tom Hardy - opposite of calming to me lol - kind-of funny to me.

 

You only have couple days left in hospital? I'm not sure how you feeling today, I noticed your recent post sounds much more positive than few days ago. I hope you can hold on to some of this & sending you best wishes & strength for coming days💪

 

Ps- I watched 'read b'ween the lines' 😄 and 'why are you anxious'😬

 

🐰🐣🥚

Re: Trying makes it worse

Hi @maddison I've been watching his clips on loop in hospital ! And today I watched why am I anxious ..lol  ...my favourite is "red flags" and "human interaction is so easy"

How was today? Hope Ur feeling OK and finding goodness and peace 

It's hectic in hospital now after a weird two days. I felt a bit better yesterday but today I had leave from hospital and Ingot too anxious about it...I think I've had enough of hospital although don't want to go home and I'm thinking into the future, like I didn't sleep well here and how will I settle back home, or even contemplate going to work, which I somehow feel if I'm on no sleep everyone will see through me all that I've been thru, I'm feeling small and worried.

It's hard to be I  hopsital, it's nice to be around ppl who get it, but it's such a mixed bag.

Re: Trying makes it worse

Hi everyone

I'm discharging tomorrow morning and then seeing my psych

It's been hard q bit getting ready to go home

My favourite show is out season 2 and I'm watching that tonight, and rugging up here.

I have gotten used to having nurses around to talk to, they are so wonderful and caring. I didn't realise how much I got used to it, I'm very lonely and isolated in my life and have trouble with relationships,

My friends are very busy and hectic and my depression has put me I guess behind them. I feel left behind.

I really benefited in hospital and am scared to return home.

How are u all? X

2

@Former-Member @maddison @tyme @wellwellwellnez 

I tried finding others who've written here  but maybe they have left the forum? X

Re: Trying makes it worse

Hi @EternalFlower 

 

Good luck with discharge tomorrow. I hope everything goes smoothly for you.

 

I understand what you mean about feeling behind. I feel very much that way. I do my best not to let it get me down. Occasionally I have the epiphany that I am not in competition with anyone. It is great feeling to really know that I am only one, racing myself! Currently, tonight, I am in a space where I have forgotten that.... Finding connection with others is truly difficult.

 

I am a little bit curious about what your favourite show is🤔 Anyway enjoy it. TV is great!

I'm not sure what I'm watching tonight. 

 

It is wonderful to hear that the nurses were so lovely to you. Maybe try to hold on to that. I know it is difficult readjusting. You will be ok💙💜💚

 

(I have trouble tagging ppl too - not sure why)

 

I have been trying desperately to get psych evaluation for last couple months with GP help. I might be making some headway - appt. have another appointment with GP tomorrow. My anxiety and depression have been lingering way more than usual. I'm researching the possibility that I've been "under-diagnosed". It is very hard to get psych at moment due to covid. I am in my mid 40s - it will be strange to get new diagnosis now!


 @EternalFlower  ♥️🧚‍

Re: Trying makes it worse

good luck today @EternalFlower 

👍

Re: Trying makes it worse

Hello ! I was trying to tag @chibam @NatureLover @Scream58 ...hi.

 

Hi @maddison how was Ur day? It went well today with psych

he said he can admit me to hospital any time I need...and he is just so nice.

I caught up with a peer worker today and she was also lovely. I think peer support is crucial

 

I wanted to explore more about what you wrote so will have a think...

I feel attached to my therapist or more attached to hope of recovery 

Re: Trying makes it worse

Hi @maddison how did Ur day go, did u find a nice show to watch?

I'm watching "russian doll" on netflix which I like.

I also watched pam and tommy on Disney plus, and found it funny and entertaining. 

Discharged early morning than straight to my psych appt...and had follow up peer support. They call u and check in, and and she also texted me after..it was supportive.

I've had an evaluation with a psych, it was not what I expected!  Hope u can make headway

It is definitely hard to get diagnosed and confronting. I'm feeling that too. Sending hugs 

Re: Trying makes it worse

I'm back home after a time in hospital

I'm completely overwhelmed and at a loss of how to be at home

I saw my therapist today, Dr Lovely, who I see semi regularly for counselling and meds.

He's a fairly open personality and sometimes talks about himself, he has difficult parents

He told me the diff between his parents and mine is that mine have more power and authority over me, as I was their only girl, and they had sexist attitudes etc and also he lives in a diff state to them, giving them less power.

 

I've learnt recently about 

The Power Threat Meaning Framework, maybe I'll bring it to him next session

I sometimes bring things to talk about or write stuff down, but today I told myself if I even get there and am on time and dressed  showered and present, this is enough, 

 

I hoped he would've received the handover notes from  ny hospital but he hadn't yet which made it a bit less easy for me to recount what had happened there

 

He was not involved in my admission this time  but could be next time.

 

Hospital was ok 8/10 miss it a bit, unpacking is triggering etc...

Hi @maddison @jazz @tyme @wellwellwellnez 

Re: Trying makes it worse

I was wondering what show you meant and then I just found out that Russian Doll released a second season. It's Russian Doll, right? I know it is. First season was masterpiece stuff.

 

Where the heck are they going to take it though? Essentially they're attempting a sequel to a Groundhog Day format. Can that even be done? I'm riveted already.

Re: Trying makes it worse

Hi @wellwellwellnez how are u doing ? 

I'm very terrified of spoilers so will stick to last season but yes..so amazing. I'm on episode 3 and watched season 1 again to get back into it, actually while in hppsital. I find it super riveting. It all dropped...I did have some fear along what u said, if they would be kind of stuck and not have anywhere to go, but I think it was pitched originally as 3 seasons and they have more to say.....☺