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A holistic approach to healing and recovery.

TW: mentions violent crime


Where do I begin? I was diagnosed around 17 years ago with Schizophrenia. At that point I stayed in bed for months, I didn’t want to socialise. I wanted to die. Many months later it occurred to me that I either die here in bed or I get up and make something of my life. 

eventually I got back to work. I applied for work experience as a computer technician as it was an area of interest. Somehow I ended up in a relationship. I really disliked the idea of selling people things or charging exorbitant fees for service that was not required. Eventually I went back to study and shorty after my partner announced I was going to be a father. This, really kicked my ass. In order to support them I’d need to find another job asap. I managed to get a job as a liquor store 2ic until around 2 years later when I was held up just before Christmas. This, really, kicked my ass.


I immediately applied to QTAC and began studying I.T while working casual as a sales assistant. Our second child arrived a year later but that was long enough to get the experience and secure a new role in I.T. I felt the relationship was beginning to fall apart so I decided I’d need to make a few changes. I read a lot ok books, made some lifestyle changes (less liquor) and improved diet. I also began a mindfulness practice because inside I was on fire. I still felt irritated each weekend while at home and clearly this is was not my preference. I stopped taking the Anti-psychotic by tapering it down to and ceased taking it completely.


around 8 months later I went back to the same psychiatrist that I had originally seen, to discuss some of the concerns I had at the time. During a 20 minute appointment and very limited information I was told to begin taking the anti-psychotic medication and incrementally increase it overtime. I’m unsure what the target dose would have been but I only made if so far before I noticed, memory loss, coordination problems and the inability to sit and meditate without distraction. 

A year later, after stopping the medication again, without consulting the practitioner, I was told “you don’t need anti-psychotic medication”


currently, nearly four years later, I don’t know what my diagnosis is and regardless of who I complain too, the ombudsman, AHPRA, hospital, health service, it appears they think I’m imagining it all or that, ignoring me will fix the situation.


Re: A holistic approach to healing and recovery.

Hi @Simba142 


Gosh sounds like a tough journey you've been on. Thank you for sharing that with us. Being held up must have been awful on top of all your struggles with the diagnosis. Equally frustrating must have been that you've been told you do need antipsychotics to only be told you don't.


It sounds like the lifestyle changes you made really helped, but I understand your disdain towards the psychiatrists that you saw. We can be made to feel powerless in these situation, especially as psychiatrists are still considered to be at the top of the hierarchy in the mental health system. I used to work in a community mental health setting and often saw this power struggle play out within my own team. As a peer worker I would just sit back and observe. The participants at our service would have the choice of having a mental health nurse, psychologist or psychiatrist (or a combo of some of them). Many did not like seeing the psychiatrist but other found great benefit from him. Others gained most from our psychologist or mental health nurse. Part of the complexity of mental health, to me, is finding the right care that fits your current needs but also suits your belief and value system when it comes to health and wellness. 


Anyway I hope you find support here on the forums. There is also the option to talk to one of our counsellors. You can reach out to the SANE drop in line until 10pm and speak to a counsellor. The number is 1800 187 263 and there is also a webchat option.


take care and thanks again for sharing your story,


Re: A holistic approach to healing and recovery.

Thanks @hanami . I really just wanted to bring attention to the fact that sometimes, not all is as it may appear. A diagnosis is only an opinion, yet the clinical opinion seems to be able to dictate how your life will play out and what opportunities are available to you, if you’re eligible for certain form of insurance..


also, I wanted to point out that I do strongly believe, if approached in the right way, possibly using functional medicine / implementing metabolic psychiatry many symptoms may ease or disappear. 

recent neuroscience research has shown psychology needs a bit of an update and to consider the entire body, environment, relationships / lifestyle rather than accuse a specific location inside the brain or a neurochemical imbalance. Why only target the individual, it’s society that’s often the core of the problem.

Re: A holistic approach to healing and recovery.

I've just started a thread on my self-discovery jounrey and asked if anyone can relate to being misdiagnosed or who have been treated by incompetent and/or negligent practitioners. Then I come across your post. I can't help but wonder how many people in Australia have actually been misdiagnosed?


I'm really sorry that you've been through what you've been though. It sounds like you are a very strong person to have been through what you have and yet still been able to achieve some amazing feats, I'm also I'm glad for you that it sounds like you have a loving family.


As unfair as it is, it appears that it's only those with the financial means as well as a stroke of luck, that one can get a mental health professional who is not only competent, but whom doesn't favour certain diagnosees because of then being able to prescribe often life-long medications, to people who don't actually need them, as is what many have tried to do to me over the years.


The elephant in the room that needs to be talked about at this time in Australia, is the utter lack of any reliable diagnostic assessment Psychiatric services provided by the public health system, let alone by the private health system.


It's been all but impossible for me to get an accurate diagnosis for more then 20 years, until 2 years ago. I'm still not fully diagnosed yet, hopefully will be in April though.


Best wishes to you OP, I hope that you get the answers that you are in search of. 



Re: A holistic approach to healing and recovery.

Hi @Simba142,

It sounds like you have had a pretty rough journey over the last few years. I think it is testament to you that despite feeling so down you went back work and undertook took a degree. 

I can only imagine how confronting the robbery must of been for you. I hope you have been able to process it and talk with a professional around this experience. I also acknowledge the experiences you have had around professional help and treatment. At the end of the day everyone's experiences will be different around seeking professional help and medication. What doesn't work and may not be the right fit for one may still work and be the right fit for another. 

I wish you all the best and I hope you find the answers you are looking for.

Warm regards,



Re: A holistic approach to healing and recovery.

@Simba142 I totally agree with all of what you just said. The bit about society being the core of the problem particularly resonates with me. We have become so individualistic (definitely in the traditional type of mental health care) and I think it's very narrow-minded. Johan Hari's books relate to this and are so interesting.

Hanami 😊 

Re: A holistic approach to healing and recovery.




There is no disorder. 


There is electricity going against our head from magnetic pole variations as well as frequencies [both manmade and natural]. 


It is inherently against us.


And we shape it as it is.


Into the sub, the con and the suss.


It's always a shadow over things.


When you feel down, remember that there are things against our head.


So that you can pierce the shadow.


Try not to get too wrapped up the multiple diagnosis. It's not going to get rid of it.


Learn to hate the subconsuss and pierce through it.


In regards to the medication. Psychotic medication they give to people with alhzaeimers to increase their brain activity.

Anti psychotic medications are used simply to reduce your brain activity.


It's not a solution to the subconsuss. 


It's medication is to sedate people. It dosnt treat the subconsuss.

Re: A holistic approach to healing and recovery.

@hanami I haven’t actually read any of Johan’s books although, I’m aware of them. I agree! When you’re surrounded by people who believe in you and want to see you flourish, life is much easier. Even if the only person who wants to see that, is yourself. It all begins within, society can make many assumptions but what matters is your self-esteem, self-talk, self-worth. Society will often do all it can to rot your self-worth.

Re: A holistic approach to healing and recovery.

It's so true @Simba142  You have to be your own number one supporter!

How are things with your own little family now?

My husband has been a great support to me but honestly, I have to believe in myself - exactly as you say! But it really helps so much when you have a good support network who want you to flourish. 


Re: A holistic approach to healing and recovery.

@hanami my partner, although she really kicked my ass, was extremely supportive throughout our relationship. Given the events I described earlier, we are no longer together. I still see both children regularly. My world view changed a lot when they were born, something about a beginners mind that really makes someone take a step back. Somewhat similar to Eddie Jaku - The happiest man on earth. I’m unsure I’d have survived a lot of the past years without reading Mans Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl and many others first.

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