Lived Experience Forum

[Lisa23]

I am in my 50's and have just been diagnosed as BPD today by a psychatrist.  I have asked two previous psychologists whether they thought I had BPD and have already started DBT therapy for an eating disorder which is why I had to see the psychiatrist (to get the extra medicare subsidies for my eating disorder).

I don't know how to feel.  In a way, it's ok because I already had BPD before the diagnosis and nothing has changed.  On the other hand, I'm sad about the diagnosis somehow, and also really sad that I have lived more than half my life without being able to understand what was happening to me.  

He told me within 45 minutes what my diagnosis is after years of wondering.  I have previously been diagnosed with anxiety, major depression, C-PTSD and an eating disorder.  

[hanami]

Hi @Lisa23 

Firstly, a huge welcome to you! I love to see new faces around here. Well not literally see them but you know what I mean. 

Second, I'm so sorry you're feeling so low about the diagnosis. It's tough when you get a new diagnosis and being in my 50s imagine that it's even harder as you have said, knowing you have had BPD for so many years. I don't have it but I do have GAD, and have had an ED in the past. I honestly believe even though I don't say I have an ED now, I still live with it. Day to day is fine but on big occasions when there is a lot of different foods around, I can find particularly challenging. 

Anyway, back to you. There are lots of love folks here with BPD diagnosis who I'm sure can jump in with some wise words. I do hope you stick around and get to know us. I'm sure you'll find a lot of good come out of the forums. I am one of the peer workers and love it. 

Take care

Hanami

[tyme]

HI @Lisa23 ,

I'm hearing you. Whatever you feel about the diagnosis is absolutely reasonable. I read that you mentioned the label is not going to change the fact that you have BPD. At the same time, I an see how it could be quite confusing and confronting.

If you don't mind, I can share my experiences of being diagnosed with BPD. Honestly speaking, it was quite liberating. It was as though inside I was saying, "All the things I have been feeling have a name now - BPD!" For years I struggled with disordered eating, emotional outbursts, anxiety, PTSD etc. My head was so confused. However, a diagnosis of BPD really helped me to realise what was going on. It also helped me to get the treatment I needed. I was admitted as an outpatient into a BPD clinic and went through nearly 2 years of MBT. It was a godsend. 

Once my BPD got 'sorted', the other comorbidities could be handled and managed in a much better way. 

BPD has truly changed my life - for the better.

Please reach out if you have any BPD-related questions. I'd love to help you where I can.