Lived Experience Forum

[Shaz51]

@NatureLover , message above from @BPDSurvivor 

[NatureLover]

Thanks, @Shaz51 !

Hi, @BPDSurvivor , I've missed seeing you around! 

[BPDSurvivor]

As someone with BPD, those who truly aligned their work to the Principles of Care, made a huge impact on my life. It was the difference between ‘make or break’.

Those who saw me as ‘Oh, another borderline. They are just looking for attention. Let them go’ were ones who broke me. The comments made me feel worthless and a waste of space.

However, there were also those who saw me as more than the sum of my diagnosis. I wasn’t just another ‘BPD case’ to them.

Collaborative Therapeutic Relationship

The collaborative therapeutic relationships developed in my recovery were invaluable in making me who I am today. The key words being ‘collaborative’ and ‘therapeutic’ – I didn’t want to repeat myself over and over again to every therapist I saw.

Trauma-sensitive Care

When I was in distress, the trauma-sensitive care principle meant I was met with compassion, empathy and respect. This aided my recovery in that it gave me a reason to continue.

Working with Family/Friends/Supporters

I didn’t have many people around me when I was acutely unwell. I’d pushed people away and lived in isolation. I didn’t think this principle of working with family/friends/supporters applied to me, but in actual fact, my whole treating team ended up being my supporter and advocate. The system worked together as a whole so that I received the treatment I needed, and at a time I needed it most. Providing ongoing supports I could access has meant the continuity of care and support throughout my recovery.

Recovery (Wellbeing) Focus

For me, I learnt that recovery was not about the absence of symptoms or the need to always be happy, but rather, that I could live a rich and fulfilling life. Treatment allowed me to work with what was important in my life. It gave me agency and empowered me to make a difference – to BE the DIFFERENCE I wanted to be.

Use a Structured Treatment Framework

As a borderline, my life was in turmoil. It was messy from the time I woke up to the time I went to bed. This principle of having a structured treatment framework added stability to my life. It gave me boundaries to keep me ‘safe’. I helped me develop a therapeutic relationship with my key clinician which was built on trust, openness and boundaries. The relationships developed during my recovery were seen, in my eyes, as the relationships I’d develop in the real world. Hence, treatment was a ‘training ground’ for the wider world.

All up? I’m here today to tell my story because of the care I received. Care that was founded on these BPD Core Principles of Care. It wasn’t care to make me dependent on people or the system – but rather, care to empower me to see the change that was needed to not only survive, but thrive in the world.

@rye @Faith-and-Hope @Sweetpea2020 @Little_Leopard @tyme @Horacette @encee @Coffeelover82 @L12 @Needhope @BlueBay @EternalFlower @NatureLover @MissLil @Shaz51 @Faith-and-Hope @Birdofparadise8 @Captain24 @Bow 

[BPDSurvivor]

Hi @BPD_Cat  @Giselle_ 

Welcome to the forums here where you can connect with others diagnosed with BPD 🙂

I'm a survivor of BPD and it's been the hardest but best experience I've had. I've certainly learnt a lot from it - a journey of discovery and learning. Welcome aboard!

[_PixieSolstice_]

Ahhhh can’t believe I missed topic Tuesday, it was the one I wanted and needed!!!

rewind a couple of months. In hospital and “I’ve met you for ten mins, I believe it’s BPD, get therapy”

came out of hospital confused as heck and my medical team all thought it was baloney.

like two months ago? My psychiatrist talked trauma with me. Turns out, I have more trauma than I like to admit. Which combined with everything else going on, and my sister having it (so it’s in the family!) yeah. He has said it’s “borderline personality traits”

so yep. Here I am, trying to wrap my head around it all. Tonight’s discussion was very helpful 😊😊😊

[BPDSurvivor]

Hey @_PixieSolstice_ ,

Good on you taking the time to go through tonight's Topic Tuesday responses. I'm sorry to have missed you live, but at least you are here!

I can certainly relate to what you mean by "I believe it's BPD, get therapy". That's what I got from the hospital too at one stage. Then I asked, "What therapy? From where?" I never got an answer.

Unfortunately, because of how long it takes for BPD treatment to 'work', there are so few places in Australia that run these specific BPD therapies. This is the sad part because BPD is so treatable. It's one MH condition where medication is not key, but psychotherapy.

I, too, didn't realise I had trauma in my childhood which led to my BPD. I found it hard to accept because that was the only childhood I knew. That was my 'normal'. There was no significant abuse or anything, but rather, my parents didn't know how to develop a bond with me. They did the best they could. Yet this was where the trauma lay.

Having treatment in group therapy was so helpful. But as @Giselle_ asked about groups, it's actually really difficult to get into group therapies - purely because they are pretty much non-existent!

Through BPD Awareness Week, I hope the need and push more more available BPD treatment will be made available.

In the meantime, just keep going. The journey is worth every moment.

[BPDSurvivor]

Hi @NatureLover and @Shaz51 ,

Hope you are both okay 🙂 It's lovely to see you passing through.

It's been a busy one for me lately. I can't keep track of days or times since I've been on school holidays.

I am meeting up with 2 work colleagues tomorrow for brunch which will be nice. I don't usually do social meetups (especially with work people because it can cause a conflict of interest), but I'm pushing myself out of the BPD comfort zone to socialise with people outside the workplace. This is certainly something I need to do more of. 

Otherwise I tend to hide behind children or work. 

As borderlines, we have our '4 walls of comfortable', and we don't like to go beyond that. I've noticed today how little I honestly trust people. I've been hurt so many times in the past, so that trust is something I need to work on.

Anyway, I don't think you asked for all this info, but love seeing you all anyway.

[NatureLover]

Great to see you, @BPDSurvivor ! I hope your brunch goes well today and you enjoy it 🙂

[Faith-and-Hope]

❤️ @BPDSurvivor 

[_PixieSolstice_]

“There was no significant abuse or anything, but rather, my parents didn't know how to develop a bond with me. They did the best they could. Yet this was where the trauma lay.”

ah @BPDSurvivor thats exactly what’s going on with me!!!!