Feeling Lost

[outlander]

its not really the social media side of things @Snowie im watching the people get to carry on and have normal lives while mines been turned upside for helping people.

i wanted to do nursing but now i dont think i can handle the workload or have the time to study it.

i have so many things all the time to try and consider all the time i get so lost on what to do

[Snowie]

That is understandable hon @outlander 

We are good at comparing ourselves to others and their achievements.

I know it may be far fetched but try and do what makes you happy hon. I know that is much easier said then done, but sometimes we just need to put ourselves first.

In saying that I know you have so many other responsibilities that you have to try and deal with.

[outlander]

thank you @Snowie its hard most days.
alot of my enjoyment for things seem to be gone.

[NatureLover]

---

@outlander wrote:
@NatureLoveri want to do things like move out/get my own place, be more independent rather then everyone knowing where i am 24/7, study without the pressures of having to have so many responsibilities.

---

@outlander  Can you just focus on one thing, like getting your own place? You're working, so have proof of employment for renting a flat. I really hope you can 💙

[Appleblossom]

@outlander  It would be very difficult to deal with.  Coming to terms with what you can and cannot do with your injuries and the long term implications.  As well as the fact that your injuries came from something you loved doing as well as the business career side of it.  

I can say I had to go through a similar journey as my neck injury came from my own desire to do the best I could on piano and my mother's continuing pressures that I was not doing enough.  It remains a bittersweet thing but I have learned to live with it.  You may not really know what you are capable of until you "fully heal" if that is possible. Our living environment is a huge key to feeling safe and able to thrive.  Sometimes achievements happen in little spurts and dribs and drabs over time.  Getting your mindset clear and your personal space clear of toxic input is a huge part of the way I managed.  It is your decision.  Sometimes we toss things up for a while and sometimes we dive in.  We are here for you.  You can do a lot, keep having faith in yourself and be kind to yourself.

[Delicatessen]

I felt incredibly lost and without purpose when I stopped drinking.

I had to prepare a plan to stop drinking when I left rehab. They were wonderful. I identified 12 things I wanted to do to look after myself from the emotional, physical, spiritual, financial, relationships and psychological perspectives.

Some of the main things I still carry with me is mindfulness, being present, using your emotional thermometer etc.

The BIGGEST most profound thing they gave me was a new way of living. It’s called “living by your values”. Means that rather than thinking about “things” immediately, the first thing you should consider is what’s important to you (love, holidays, family, cooking). Once you know these you have something to help guide your decisions by. And that was where I found my priorities and purpose.

So this is how I live. It’s a bit abstract but it’s absolutely worked for me. Suggestion only.

[Dimity]

Greetings @outlander 

I also feel lost. Thanks for your collective wisdom @NatureLover @Snowie @Appleblossom @Delicatessen and others.

I've felt like a lost soul since stopping work (I was a workaholic and identified with my calling). I'm having to rework my values and 

wrestle with my limitations to find new interests or unearth old ones.

I bought an acceptance and commitment therapy workbook that offers hope (if/when I start it!).

Dimity

[tyme]

Hugs @Dimity 

ACT is incredible. Such a simple concept, which, if practised, has profound effects.

I'm interested to hear how you find it.

Hope you are well.

[outlander]

thank you @Appleblossom there has been lots of changes but i guess there are some positives in there too. i understand the bittersweet feeling

[outlander]

hi @Delicatessen

living by values sounds like a good way to put things. it helps put things into perspective