Lived Experience Forum

[Kurra]

Talk about pain @Former-Member. It's incredibly intense. If I weren't drunk I'd go to the hospital.
Ir is what it is I guess. Somehow I'll just have to plid on through the mess.

Whar a waste my life has been!

[BambiFawn]

@Kurra, 

Sorry to hear beautiful kurra that you may lose your job.  

Always remember lifeline counsellors and support are here for you 24/7 on 131114.  They can refer you to supports and organisations that will help if you are facing homelessness.  They are excellent and very caring.  

As I said before Centrelink can help you with a refuge or interim money.

All the best dear beautiful Kurra and get some good rest luv.  

[Former-Member]

Pain through the alcohol isn't good @Kurra could you call an ambulance? Or get someone to take you if you need?
I don't believe your life has been a waste my dear friend, you've helped so many... Raised four children.(i think...) And work so hard. Not a moment ofb waste. But I do think you are going through so much right now everything else is kind of out of sight... Holding on to hope for you that done of the things... Can get better xx

[BambiFawn]

beautiful @Kurra, 

You're life has not been a waste.  No life is a waste dear lovely Kurra.  God has a plan for your life it says ' To give you hope and a future and to prosper you.'God's will for our lives has reason and purpose. ... 11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

When you're feeling lost and unsure about God's plan for your life, you can rest assured... that He never abandons His children and has charted out a path for you. God can make a way, where there is no way.

I love a drink too occasionally, but alcohol can make feelings more intense such as sadness and depression and mood.

[Former-Member]

Hello @Kurra, its 3am, i just got up to the toot, found your post and just had to respond. Hopefully you're getting some much needed 'shuteye' and will wake feeling a little better. Maybe a visit to the Dr for a checkup and changes to your pain management.

You sound in so much emotional and physical pain / distress tonight. I wish I could scoop you up in a big hug, 'till it all melts away. Its so understandable that you've hit the bottle to get some relief.

Naturally your mind is in hyperdrive trying to anticipate or stop the impact of this looming cascade of major life losses :
- your job
- financial security
- your life purpose (?retirement - 67yo)
- your home (roof & processions)
- your 18yo dog / companion 
- your vices - smokes & drink re no$ "at all"
- etc 😞

These are such difficult changes, for anyone! Especially all at once.

Don't listen to the lies and negativity of 'blackdog' (keep him on a leash lol) but especially Please please never declare your life as "wasted"

YOU ARE SO MUCH MORE THAN WHAT CAN BE TAKEN AWAY FROM YOU!

Sometimes a good nights sleep can make all the difference.

Deep breaths and lots of water for you when you wake up.

Do you have a day off today? What's your plans? Hopefully soothing activities and lots of self care while you're coming to terms with things. Maybe time with a friend would be good, meet for a coffee, somewhere nice.

You know, your not alone. Though each story is different, many before you face the same life challenges and pull through. When it felt my life was over - a kind person whispered in my ear

"its time for you now"

This was a major learning curve for me, Self-Compassion and Self-Care, and not attaching my identity to 'performance' and 'money' etc

You will find yourself again through this crisis and that's a beautiful peaceful place to be.

Life is change, youve been through so much and you can survive this too.

Stay strong - i'll be praying for you - for peace, and for wisdom in your decisions. And that the information you need will come to you in the right time, and that tbe right people will be put on your path, and you find support in the most unsuspected places 🙂 

Hugzz-n-hugzz precious Kurra 💜💜💜

[Shaz51]

Oh my dear  @Kurra  sending you tender and loving hugs

[Owlunar]

AW @Kurra

This is not good at all - I know about back pain

Tell me about the back pain first - I know you have self-medicated and have no money left so if you have some kind of fall or other accident then you need to have it checked to see if you haven't made something worse or have inflammation or whatever that is causing the pain to be so much worse

I get it - I really do - and it feels hopeless

Please - for your own sake - get to the hospital as soon as the alcohol as worn off - 

I know you know that wasn't the best idea you ever had but it seem like a good idea at the time

I wish you the best - I so do - chronic pain is so bad

I could write on the other issues but I think that one is the worst one - the one you need to cope with first

Sending very gentle virtual hugs

Dec

[Appleblossom]

@Kurra

Glad people were about and able to post when you needed it.

I hear you about dealing with extreme and ongoing SI but also making stance not to follow through on such thoughts.  You know it has been a big part of my life too.

I also need to be busy at a high level to distract both from SI and the physical pain then need to rest.

But dammit ... you do deserve some sense of retirement and security as does your dog.

You have EARNED a pension @Kurra.  Try and get something established before things go totally pear shaped.  You can have a busy active retirement.  See it as pay for a lot of study and work completed.

We could start a MH activist group which would give my life meaning.

Thinking of you Bella

[Former-Member]

Here with you @Kurra - hope you're resting today or getting some help with the pain. Take care of you

[BambiFawn]

 well said dear @Former-Member, 

Hugs and blessings