Hey everyone, 

Happy to get us started with a few of my own thoughts and ideas on the questions @amber22 has posed 😊

Q1: What does being yourself look like for you? What might a sense of belonging look like? 

For me, being myself can include having an absence of a feeling like I have to ‘hide’ aspects of myself, whether that be for my own protection or the comfort of others. Not that 'the comfort of others' is necessarily a great reason for something like this...

I think of a sense of belonging as being an acceptance of me to the point where I feel like I'm valued and a welcome part of something (like a social group or work team for example).

Q2: When you have the opportunity to be yourself safely, what emotions arise for you and how does it make you feel? Or, how do you imagine it might feel? 

For me, these scenarios where I can safely be myself brings a really strong feeling of liberation and often, also relief, because these spaces aren't necessarily every space.

Q3: Do you have spaces where you feel you can be yourself? If so, where/what are these spaces? If not, where might you be able to seek out these safe spaces? 

In many ways, these kinds of spaces are ones I'm still discovering. But these safe spaces can be, for example, by myself, with my dog, with close and trusted loved ones or in a setting where I am surrounded by like-minded people. For example, if I am among peers who I know share an aspect of my lived/ living experience, I am more likely to feel safe and comfortable to be open about these experiences, and in effect, be more myself.

Q4: What do you need in order to feel comfortably yourself in a space? What are the qualities that other people would need to have in these spaces in order for you to feel safe being yourself? 

The things I need and qualities of others which would help make spaces feel safer for me to be myself are very similar, if not one and the same. They include, among other things, acceptance and respect. Acceptance of who I am, including things that may be different from the other person and respect for both those differences and things that may be important related to those differences. As a few general examples, this could look like accommodations for someone with disability or openly sharing pronouns to better ensure a space is safe and welcoming for people from the LGBTQIA+ community.

This kind of safe space is also often facilitated for me by sense of psychological safety, empathy, connection and being embraced. Most of these qualities are reflected in this image below, which itself was borrowed from a Ted Talk by Carin Taylor, which you can find here

Q5: How might we be able to help create spaces where we and others feel safe to be ourselves? 

One huge thing I can think of in creating safe spaces is avoiding assumptions and having an awareness of the possibility of different needs and where possible, trying to pre-empt and normalise these. For example facilitating introductions inclusive of pronouns, Asking about access needs or if there's any other information that might be helpful to know to help someone feel safer and more supported and comfortable. Of course, I feel it's important to note this might not all happen at once, because a lot of these kinds of things are very sensitive and personal to individuals, so it might take time to develop the comfort and courage to openly discuss these kinds of things with another person, particularly if there’s been a lot of rejection, judgement or trauma in the past, for example. But, I feel like pre-empting and normalising can help signal a degree of safety and acceptance from the start.

Q6: What do you imagine some of the impacts might be if you are able to engage in more spaces where you feel comfortable to be yourself? 

For me, it would, and does, certainly eliminate a great deal of pressure and stress to not feel like I have to hide in plain sight, or in some cases effectively ‘put on a show’, because having to do these things can be absolutely exhausting, and it takes a toll too!

Q7: What might it mean to belong as yourself?  

For me, this would mean having a sense of acceptance, value and being part of something as myself. Not a version of myself, and ideally not part of myself, but my best/ whole self. Not who I might feel a need to pretend to be or who someone else tries to make me be. Because there is a difference between belonging and fitting in. To me to truly belong is to get to truly be myself, and that, to me, means the world.

I'm really looking forward to hearing everyone's thoughts if you'd like to share with us 😊

@tonys @Captain24 @CatMom 

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