i feel really lost in life. i dont know what i want to do in life or i do but it doesnt seem overly acheiveable. im so indecisive all the time. i dont know what to do.
im finding myself getting so jealous of other people who are doing well and succeeding in life. i normally love whe those around me succeed but sometimes i wish their experiences were mine. so many things have changed in my life or have been placed upon me that its hard to see the next day sometimes.
That sounds like such a tough feeling to sit with. I can remember feeling that way a few times in my life, particularly when I was younger. I would think of things I wanted to do (in terms of study/career paths) but when I broke it down I would feel like it was so out of reach. Then I'd see others and wonder how they manage to do it and why couldn't I. I think this is common for people to fee this way at various times in their lives.
I do like @NatureLover's suggestion of thinking breaking things down to see what you CAN achieve. What IS possible. It could be the smallest step you end up taking but it might help you feel like you are on a better path; that you're CAN accomplish things.
I am a mum of 2 differently performing children. It can create a dynamic where one feels left behind. My heart goes out for both of them.
Life can be a bit of a crazy circus with some rushing forward ticking so many boxes and then falling off the wagon later or hiding other issues. We can never really be sure what each person is dealing with or the advantages and opportunities they have. I guess that is why the "dont make comparisons" wisdom emerged. Being satisfied with personal best can be a good mantra or attitude, but feelings are feelings and do not always do what our head says.
You have done heaps and achieved a lot. Console yourself. You have done it amongst lots of health challenges. Keep a learning edge open.
@outlander I am sorry you feel so lost hon. It really is a difficult place to be.
I think it is normal to be jealous of others and what their life looks like. It is a normal reaction that I think we all have had and nothing to be ashamed about. Unfortunately with social media these days we just get glimpses of peoples lives and they don't always show up the hard times, just the good.
I agree that it hard to see the next day at times. You have so much placed on your shoulders by your family that it would make it difficult to see beyond that.
Please remember that you have your whole life ahead of you and that age is no barrier. My cousin just completed nursing school and she is 47 years young. It has been a dream of hers since childhood.
You are one of the strongest people I know hon and believe that in time you can achieve anything you set your mind to.
@NatureLover i want to do things like move out/get my own place, be more independent rather then everyone knowing where i am 24/7, study without the pressures of having to have so many responsibilities.
i dont even know if i can study what i would like to study. my injuries have changed so much but ot my interests its making it really hard to know what i want to do at this point or what i ca do at this point
thank you @hanami i try to be positive and breaking things down but its not enough right now. i get tired of having to break things down into small steps or always look for the positives. i just want to have more normalicy in life
i guess part of it is the persons horse who contributed to my injury and a whole life upset gets to carry on as normal, carry on with new horses and become a better rider and get all these experiences but yet i had to give up my bussiness, all my clients are gone and now everyone thinks different of me. its been to much of an adjsutment and ill forever be paying the price of it
