Something’s not right
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19-01-2021 01:50 PM
19-01-2021 01:50 PM
Re: why can't I cope longer?
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19-01-2021 02:00 PM
19-01-2021 02:00 PM
Re: why can't I cope longer?
Dear @Former-Member ,
you sound so sad, I do not know what loss you will be grieving but I know how hard it is and how these times are at anniversaries.
grief is the price we pay for love.
I will be with you and thinking of you over this time.
love peri
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19-01-2021 02:52 PM
19-01-2021 02:52 PM
Re: why can't I cope longer?
He seems ok with it. Has been invited away to beach for long weekend but wanted to fit me in for the Tuesday (Australia Death Day :/) I donno, blackdogs telling me "youre hopeless & everyone's better off without you" I don't know why SI is triggered a lot after these glitches with my son. Maybe failure or something. Oh how easy it would be. I wish there was a 'safe house' with company for me to go when I feel suicidal like this.
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19-01-2021 03:33 PM
19-01-2021 03:33 PM
Re: why can't I cope longer?
@Former-Member Next week is going to be so tough Hon but you are not hopeless and everyone is not better off without you - that is your depression and grief talking
I know that Aust Day is a massive day for you but making plans with your son may be a good distraction as well. Doing something nice together to celebrate the memory of your daughter may ease that pain a little. It is still going to be a hard day but maybe sharing that grief a little may ease the pain a bit. I now find doing something to celebrate the memory of those lost really helps. That does not mean it is not a tough day (and often still tears) but also a few smiles at the wonderful times I had with those not still with us.
In saying that, do what you feel you need to do to get through the day/week and of course we will be here to support you also. Hugs and hugs
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19-01-2021 03:42 PM
19-01-2021 03:42 PM
Re: why can't I cope longer?
Hey @Former-Member, I've just sent an email to check in with you and your safety as I can see you're going through a rough time
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19-01-2021 07:44 PM
19-01-2021 07:44 PM
Re: why can't I cope longer?
Thanks appreciate support. I don't think I've ever expected 'counselling' here, though it is a fine line between that and peer support (in my experience) so I don't need those referrals, be understand it's a necessary protocol / accountability, sorry to cause alarm. I'll try shorten blackdogs leash 😕
Dr apt this pm. BP good, scans show pinched nerve degeneration and of cause there's nothing they can do. Told to 'look after myself" which translated means lose weight. Yep, aleady know that. My parting words were "it's impossible" No time for emotional issues... she's just come back from leave and was already 1.5hrs behind for me, she got called out of my consult for emergency and I needed scripts... so no, really couldn't bring up the SI. Just glad the scans were benign, the blood pressure normal (re headache) & I got scripts. Called in op shop on way home (can't help myself) but was delighted to see the lawn done when I got home and furbaby soooo excited to see me. So back in bed re back... just gotta not expect too much.
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19-01-2021 08:08 PM
19-01-2021 08:08 PM
Re: why can't I cope longer?
💜🌻 @Former-Member
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20-01-2021 09:19 AM
20-01-2021 09:19 AM
Re: why can't I cope longer?
NOTE-2-SELF
https://saneforums.org/t5/Forums-Blog/Self-compassion-how-to-put-it-into-practice/ba-p/892184
And you too @Eve7 🤗
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20-01-2021 09:59 AM
20-01-2021 09:59 AM
Re: why can't I cope longer?
Hello dear @Former-Member
just wanted to let you know I haven't forgotten you. Juggling my balls of life (not very well at present) but think of you and always brings a smile to my face when I see you, love and hugs xoxo
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20-01-2021 11:52 PM
20-01-2021 11:52 PM
Re: why can't I cope longer?
I nearly cancelled but made myself stick to a plan to take a new friend to movies... glad I did, it was her birhday today. We watched 'The Dry' which was quite good - Eric Bana was great, good storyline.
We had a gelato & coffee after (icecream shop) but we were swamped by a large group of young school girls reminding me of my girl 😢 It's torture! I was able to hold it 'till we finished coffee, and I think it went well. Tricky making new friends. My back's sore tonight, so bombing out tonight. 😴